Why the Law of Attraction isn’t working for you [Part 2]
In part 1, I talked about 5 different reasons why the Law of Attraction isn’t working for you.
The Law of attraction can be “tough to get” at first. It involves a change in your entire being, your mindset, your thought patterns, your stories, your emotions, your beliefs.
These things have been hard-wired into us for such a long time. For some of us, we have been taught “faulty” lines of thinking since we were reallyyyy young. These are buried in our subconscious. And we might not even be aware of that! Undoing that is gonna take time.
And these posts aim to bring those beliefs/attitudes from your subconscious to the surface, to give you awareness and insight, and allow you to gently work through those issues.
You are reactive
You allow your environment and your reality to affect your feelings.
Someone said you looked tired today and it spirals into self-doubt and self-pity. A horrible thought enters your mind and you allow it to lead you down a deep, dark place. You barely passed a test (this happened to me recently), and immediately your thoughts go to how you are never great at exams and you will never do well… On and on the list goes.
But, what if I told you that you can change your reality?
“Hmm, my reality is the here and now, how am I supposed to change it?”
Your reality changes when you let your perspectives/thoughts/emotions do the dictating. And not the other way around.
Meaning, in order to get your reality to a high-vibing place, you gotta get your beliefs/emotions and thoughts to a high-vibing place FIRST. And not just simply reacting to whatever is happening to you.
You have to be in the habit of always thinking from a positive, appreciative space no matter the circumstances.
And yes, I recognise there is the huge challenge in doing that. Cause for some of us, it’s difficult to be positive and maintain that level of positivity when it’s tough putting food on the table or paying the bills.
I’m not saying you should deny reality. Cause sometimes life happens, and it is what it is.
If life has been very tough for you and you have been in that vibration for a long time, it can be hard to suddenly feel super excited and super positive about anything. It’s not humanly possible.
Instead, just focus on doing small, little things that feel good to you. Focus on the little things you can give thanks for.
Take small, baby steps. And once you get into the habit of focusing on the tiny positive things, you will be steadily building up positive momentum. Yes, the contrasts and the crap will still come in. That’s life and that’s normal.
As long as you spend more time being positive than negative, you are good.
This point is one of the hardest to put into practice, so go easy on yourself. You will be surprised at how easily you notice the positive stuff around you after awhile. And, don’t be surprised as well if life starts to get pretty darn amazing 🙂
You are reluctant to let go of things or people that no longer serve you
When you do this, you are literally BLOCKING the Universe from giving you what you’ve asked for.
It’s like the Universe is saying, “Go on, close this door. I’ve got another one to open to you, one filled with the things you desire and want and have been asking me for. But I need you to close this one first.”
Instead of listening, you are just standing there all defiant, blocking the entrance and saying “No I don’t want to. I don’t want to open the door to get to all the things I’ve been desiring. I want to keep my foot in this door that has all the things I don’t want”.
Does that make sense? But this is something that so many of us are guilty of.
Take relationships for instance. There was someone I knew who just couldn’t seem to find the “right guy”. I dug a little deeper and realised the reason why she couldn’t was because she was still hung up on her ex.
She still facebook-stalked him, goes through his Instagram feed daily and attributes everything he does to her.
By doing that she was literally blocking men – good men, better men than her ex possibly – from entering her life. Whenever they did manage to get through to her and they go on dates, she sees all sorts of faults in them.
Whilst they may genuinely have those faults, holding herself in the energy of her ex and her former relationship wasn’t helping her view things with new people from the correct space.
So, be willing to let go of things or people that are past their “due date” energy-wise.
Holding onto something that isn’t a match to you anymore will only bring down your energy but will prevent the stuff you truly desire from coming in.
You have contradicting beliefs
I want more money but…I believe that money is the root of all the evil in this world.
I want a job with more flexibility but…I don’t believe such a job exists.
I would really love to be in a relationship with a committed partner but…I hate commitments.
See what I’m getting at? Mixed signals.
You hold contradictory and confusing beliefs. Both are probably equally strong in your vortex, or your belief system.
The Universe picks up on this confusion and delivers it exactly as you asked. This can manifest in several ways.
For instance, you may get what you asked for, but in a slightly watered-down version, or, with several details missing, or, in a way which makes you feel like it’s very difficult to attain (your belief) and requires a lot of effort.
You need to get clear on what it is you really want and believe in, align yourself fully with it and gently let the rest go.
You push, effort and force
When we push our way through something; when we “work hard”, “effort” and “hustle”, we aren’t coming from a pure positive place. (Hey, if working hard and efforting feels good to you, go for it!)
These words and behaviours – for many of us – come from a place which feels tensed and hard. So when we are working from that energy place, we end up taking action that isn’t inspired.
We may end up doing things out of fear and anxiety. Or desperation.
The opposite of effort-ing is inspired action. I’ll probably expand on this in another post. But very simply, inspired action is action that feels effortless, it feels good, you feel this sense of “flow”
There’s little to no resistance, a lot of ease and a subtle sense of curiosity about how life will unfold.
A great gauge, as always, is to stop and ask yourself how you feel whenever you are about to do something. Does the action you are about to take make you feel – tensed or good?
That will tell you if you are effort-ing or giving into inspired action.
You resist contrast
For many of us, whenever we have a bad day or have negative thoughts – we think, oh no! Gotta be positive, think positive! And we beat ourselves up about even having those thoughts in the first place.
Hey we are only human! Don’t do that.
Beating yourself up not only puts you in a lower-vibration place, but it shows that you think it’s “wrong” to not experience contrast. That only positive stuff can exist. You resist the contrast and want it to go away.
Instead of wishing contrast never existed, embrace it! Accept it. Connect with it.
Contrasts are clarifying. They help us refine our choices. They help us understand what we don’t want, so that we know what we do want.
Whenever less positive emotions come up – instead of judging it and judging yourself for feeling it. Talk to it. Ask sadness, guilt or anger – what are you telling me?
Emotions – good or bad – usually have messages for us, and if we listen to them and not push them away, the learning comes through for us.
So, welcome the contrasts! Life just becomes all the more beautiful and enriching because of it.
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If you’d like to read more, Part 1 is here.
I sincerely hope these posts have helped you in your LOA journey. Feel free to share your experiences with me in the comments or drop me an email 🙂
With 10 years of experience as a Researcher (MSc) in Psychology, Neuroscience, Mental Health, Consumer and Organisational Behaviour; I help action-oriented, time-strapped people and solopreneurs crush their inner critics, navigate toxic workplaces and relationships and build their self-esteem so that you can have the freedom, happiness and confidence you desire. I spend the rest of my time daydreaming and downing cups of tea/coffee – my life’s vice. Ask me any question and I will answer it in a post.